A Stoic Reflection

It's amazing how things speed so fast you don't even know what you have done until the dust has settled.
In the same way how Tim O Brien never noticed his friends hummed 'lemon tree' from clearing Curt Lemon's fragmented corpse from a tree until 10 years later, there are many things we see in greater detail only after they have become memories.
These past few months has been, weirdly intense. I'm still not entirely sure of what really happened. The moods swings of anticipation, happiness, accomplishment, emptiness, confusion, anger, resignation has been more than enough for me to handle.
I never intended for anything to be messed up this way and the dust has yet to settle. But I am glad that at least I have finally found some form of conclusion to this torturous maelstorm.
I only realised this tonight during my quiet time. The bench in which we sat on, used to be my favourite study spot for Biology and geogragphy when I was still in Secondary.
Maybe when all this have faded into my memories, I will finally understand the way you felt.