CDO
The PA chimes:
"Attention Delta Wing,
this is the CDO speaking.
The time now is 2310, Lights out. Please rest your legs, you'll need them tommorrow."
I hear my Company Duty Sergant snicker (CDS) behind before he goes up for his shower.
I go through the files once more before refolding my uniform for next day. Slowly, I reopen my Jarhead novel and read for the rest of my admin time.
It was the cadets' nights out. I couldn't join them though. CDO- Company Duty Officer. Great I thought, deprived of another 4 hours of civilisation. Despite this, I enjoy doing this regimental duty. Although many say the administrative duties are stressful, I enjoy the short 24 hours you get to break from the normal routine of orders.
Disconnection from standing in file, marching in a platoon. 24 hours of specialised duties.
I watched the crowds happily book out and I am happy to have those few hours to myself. Its rest, no worries about rushing out, catching the shortest movie available, eating the best food around and rushing back. Rest is something I need.
Life is great so far. I have recovered and I am enjoying training. I enjoy the sweat, the rush, the mud and the fatigue. This place is great for me but sometimes... things just happen. I wish I could speak them out but there are somethings that just shouldnt be said. Things that shouldn't be said or even considered as problems. But I am tired by them. I am tired by their implications on me, their burden and mostly their secrecy.
I used to think Sarcasm is the greatest way to tell the most brutal messages in the most honest way. Sarcasm can't even be applied now because everyone can read through my worn-out facade.
My patience, tolerance and self has never been so strained before and its ironically not caused by what the institute deems as stress. I feel my character and morals are being challenged by the circumstances of situation. Sometimes I don't even know if I should just let go of myself and scream. Maybe that might just wake you up.
"Attention Delta Wing,
this is the CDO speaking.
The time now is 2310, Lights out. Please rest your legs, you'll need them tommorrow."
I hear my Company Duty Sergant snicker (CDS) behind before he goes up for his shower.
I go through the files once more before refolding my uniform for next day. Slowly, I reopen my Jarhead novel and read for the rest of my admin time.
It was the cadets' nights out. I couldn't join them though. CDO- Company Duty Officer. Great I thought, deprived of another 4 hours of civilisation. Despite this, I enjoy doing this regimental duty. Although many say the administrative duties are stressful, I enjoy the short 24 hours you get to break from the normal routine of orders.
Disconnection from standing in file, marching in a platoon. 24 hours of specialised duties.
I watched the crowds happily book out and I am happy to have those few hours to myself. Its rest, no worries about rushing out, catching the shortest movie available, eating the best food around and rushing back. Rest is something I need.
Life is great so far. I have recovered and I am enjoying training. I enjoy the sweat, the rush, the mud and the fatigue. This place is great for me but sometimes... things just happen. I wish I could speak them out but there are somethings that just shouldnt be said. Things that shouldn't be said or even considered as problems. But I am tired by them. I am tired by their implications on me, their burden and mostly their secrecy.
I used to think Sarcasm is the greatest way to tell the most brutal messages in the most honest way. Sarcasm can't even be applied now because everyone can read through my worn-out facade.
My patience, tolerance and self has never been so strained before and its ironically not caused by what the institute deems as stress. I feel my character and morals are being challenged by the circumstances of situation. Sometimes I don't even know if I should just let go of myself and scream. Maybe that might just wake you up.
posted by F I S at
9:50 am
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