Gone

" I think you were blind... and deaf"
"... I think so too. All the excess hair must have gotten in the way"

I have always enjoyed our sushi outings. Its not the limitless sashimi/ tempura buffet that I enjoy. Its not the temporary sense of freedom knowing that I can eat anything I want. Its not the momentary overwhelming of senses I feel when slurping down hot soft shell crabs and cold fresh squids and Swordfish fillets. Its the company, the talks, the laughs, the banter.
Yesterday was probably the last sushi outing I would have with the 'sushi-gang' as my dearest sushi-buddy debbie leaves. Sadly, I had none of the feelings I craved for. The sashimi just tasted like raw fish while the tempura squirmed in my mouth like oil. No High. The talks, the laughs, the banter were gone. Although I wasnt able to talk ( left my voice in tekong), no one else bothered to talk. It was just silence. I really enjoyed everyone's presence but something's gone.
Gone is our happy past. Past sensations are gone and I am not sure if that is a good thing. Despite knowing this, there is still part of me that wants to cling on the what is gone not because of hope but the fear of change. But the fact remains today will soon be gone, like yesterday is gone, like history is gone.Gone, like Frank Sinatra, like Elvis, like Al Pacino's Cash. Gone, my high school dreams is gone, my childhood sweets are gone. Life is a day that doesn't for long.
All I would give to borrow a moment of today to invest in a piece of the past and at the same time secure a second of tomorrow.